1968.

After suffering  his sharp criticism of the TV show ‘New Faces’, claiming he could do better, his wife dared him to apply. When Desmond Tester the producer, read Robert’s somewhat over exaggerated CV and taking note of Robert’s statement,’with the latent talent lying deep within, get me before someone else does, for artistes such as I rarely pass your way’ he invited Robert to appear on New Faces Auditions which would be held at South Sydney Junior Leagues Club in a months time. Prudence prompted Robert to use a name other than his own, after all if he was going to make a fool of himself he might as well blame a ficticious fool, and after much  soul searching arrived at the name, Bobby Gripweed.

Little known fact: For many years Robert fully believed that he had either invented his pseudonym or he’d spotted it on the back of a weed killer packet. In 1965 in between singing songs to his little daughters and their friends he chanced to read a book by Patrick Ryan titled ‘How I Won The War’ In 1967. A film was made of this novel starring Michael Crawford and John Lennon as Musketeer Bill Gripweed, but Robert did not see it until 1988. Apparently the name ‘Gripweed’ had subliminally osmosed into his brain. (interestin’ innit?)

Unfortunately the first New Face’s Auditions did not exactly rocket Robert to stardom; in fact it was little more than a damp squib. Nonetheless Terry Dear, the compare, suggested that he should learn more than four chords, make sure that he was in tune, avoid refreshing himself on glasses of neat scotch backstage and return next year for another lash.

Could This Be The Start Of Something Big? ThisBbbbXXx

1969.

Taking Mr Dear’s advice Bobby Gripweed did return. This time it was not at South Sydney Junior Leagues Club but in the Artarmon Studios which did not possess a wet bar, solving the problem of the backstage nobblers. In ten months he had added a few more chords to his musical repertoire. He had also, after attending a few talent quests, learned some stage craft and actually remembered the words of some of his songs, ergo he was well prepared and after a brief run-through with Geoff Phillips’ Channel Nine Orchestra, felt reasonably confident that he could get away with it.

Before going in front of the cameras Robert was heard to pass wind which was noted by not only the crew, but the judges, one of them remarking, “Ah, The Winds of Change”. And indeed that is exactly what they were, for Bobby Gripweed, with a score totalling one hundred and ninety eight, received the first prize of eighty dollars and an invitation to appear on Australia’s New Faces. This occured a few months later and with a total score of one hundred and sixty two he not only won this contest but was now a contender for the finals. One of his rivals remarked, ‘he’ll never get away with it.’ But they were wrong.

He had got away with it!

Unfortunately there were many other contestants who also scored one hundred and sixty two points and the chances of re-appearing on TV were almost remote. But not remote enough, for a few months later he received a lisping phone call from Desmond Tester advising him that he had been ballotted to appear in the Grand Finals in two days time.

Unfortunately the winds did not favour him this time but he continued trying out his luck in talent quests throughout the State, occasionally attaining a first or a second and managed to get thrown out of a Western Suburbs RSL club after singing Eric Bogle’s “And The Band Played Waltzing Matilda” (the management just didn’t get the point)